A Valentine's Day for no one

Valentine's Day is the day for lovebirds to flock together. If it sounds romantic, it probably is. That is for those with the other halves. There is a reason why I made fun of myself by calling myself an incel. That was how I felt in my school years. Of course, people do mature. The same goes for me. I'm no Thorfinn from Vinland Saga, but I did grow up to be someone who can live without relationships. Give me a choice, and I want friends I can confide in. As it turned out, however, I don't. Is it the end of the world? Well, the answer is no. My mental fortitude is such that I can live in isolation. I know it sounds weird, but the likes of Guts from Berserk were never that fictional. If there is any advice I can give, it'd be this: Don't just survive, but live. To survive is to be an animal. To live is to be human.

Recently, I came across a post involving Swifties gushing about how Taylor "no Gone in 60 Seconds jokes, please" Swift's songs represent women. Then they asked men whether there was anyone like that for them. My answer to such a question is this: It is good enough to see part of myself in this person or that character. I don't have to validate myself by seeing my entirety in one place or another. Living with dignity means you don't subject yourself to comparisons with this person or that person. Your life is not the other person's life. It is not meant to be a pitiable facsimile of another individual.

With that said, there are songs in which I do see part of myself. Unlike the Swifties, I don't base my preference on one singer or the other. I base my taste on songs, not the singers. Before I start this post, I decided to put up two scenes of Vinland Saga. The first reminded me of our world, while the other reminded me of what kind of man I want to be.

NOTE:

Because I don't keep track of the songs I've shared before in this blog, there's a high chance of songs repeating themselves.

Year of the Dragon's Dogma 2

The Year of the Dragon has arrived. It is coming, the day Dragon's Dogma 2 will be released. Because I'm a henjin, I will talk about Dragon's Dogma 2 instead of the Year of the Dragon.

Denunvo DRM

Firstly, let's get the controversy out of the way. Much to the dismay of many gamers, Dragon's Dogma 2 will be running on Denuvo DRM. Why the controversy, you may ask. The issue lies in a weird consistency of games running at lower performance with Denuvo. Say, for example, a game should run on 60 fps. But because of Denuvo DRM, it performed at 30 fps instead. For gamers, Denuvo DRM is a factor. But how influential? We can reference Devil May Cry 5, where the game was released with the Denuvo DRM lock. Within 2 weeks of release, Itsuno "Itstylo" Hideaki announced that DMC5 had sold 2 million copies.

Apparently, at least 2 million gamers had no issues with Denuvo DRM. But before you jump straight into the dragon's maw, I advise you to check your computer specs (if you're playing this on PC). While yet to be confirmed, word has it that Denuvo DRM can be terribly taxing on the hardware. I was lucky that my current Aftershock PC was bought last August. In short, the specs are still very new and more than enough to handle the game. But if you're not confident of your PC's specs, you should hold off until Capcom removes the Denuvo DRM lock. It will eventually happen as Denuvo charges a hefty fee for its DRM service. The logic behind this is to prevent gaming pirates from hacking the game within a certain period. The point is that gaming pirates will eventually crack the game, so gaming companies are clearly out to earn as much profit as possible before it happens. Considering the criticism of making games effectively run at 30 fps instead of the standard 60 and the vast fee involved, sticking with Denuvo is risky. Is it too dangerous? We should ask the 2 million gamers buying DMC5 within 2 weeks of release.

Note: Despite others saying otherwise, Harada "Harada no Katsuda!" Katsuhiro did NOT point the finger at Denuvo on Twitter/X. He merely said something buggy happened at the encryption program's end. As for what kind of encryption program Harada was talking about, only Namco Bandai knew. But he did say Denuvo won't be appearing for Tekken 8.

Your game is boring.

Baldur's Gate 3 fans, brace yourselves. FF14 fans, prepare yourselves. Itsuno may have some beef with your fast travelling choices. In a classic Elon "the X-man" Musk manner, he delivered a scathing verdict on fast travelling. Of course, this is NOT to say that Baldur's Gate 3 is boring. The same goes for FF14. Instead, this comes to mind Itsuno's vision of how to make travelling great again. A likely manner in which he's going to execute his #MTGA vision is unpredictability. It's like being Karolina "no pun jokes on her last name, please" Shiino or Yamazaki "the first alphabet of YKK" Taku, where you got jumped on by Shukan Bunshun, aka the Shihan of exposé. Instead of Shukan Bunshun, however, you got jumped on by random encounters from gibbering goblins to a massive troll (don't ask me whether Shiino or Yamazaki will be playing Dragon's Dogma 2, although the latter is probably too old for that. That is unless...). Imagine spending your first 30 hours dealing with this kind of stuff. That's definitely more engaging than having nothing to do. Not only that, you have no say which monstrous bastard(s) you will fight. Different monsters, different ways of killing them. In this sense, the early game will possibly be very intense.

Hey, you awake?

Remember the opening scene in Skyrim where you're (sorta) riding on a cart? In Dragon's Dogma 2, an ox cart takes you from Settlement A to Settlement B. Of course, there's a risk of the carriage getting attacked by random encounters. But this is precisely what Dragon's Dogma 2 should be about, no? No matter where you go, you'll get jumped on. But compared to wandering blindly in a world map four times larger than the first Dragon's Dogma map (and some may say twice as large as Skyrim's map), taking Grab Ox is the better option. But there's a catch: You don't get to decide where the ox cart is heading because that's Itsuno's job. Unpredictability is the alternate name of Dragon's Dogma 2. Exploration-wise, it may be better to wander in the areas around whichever settlement you're at so long you can reach back by night time. This is where ox carts come into the picture, allowing you to get your feet wet with minimal risks. At the same time, there's every chance that Vocation Maisters would be in this settlement or that settlement instead of bumming around in the wilds like a badass hobo. How long you should stay in one area depends on you.

If I buy it...

...which Vocation would I start off with? I prefer Thief as I like classes/builds running with two knives instead of a sword and shield. While this is clearly a personal thing, another choice would be Archer. The reason is that, unlike the Mage, the Archer is more towards ranged damage and support than ranged nuking. In Ukrainian speak, the Mage is like HIMARS, while the Archer is like the Javelin. As someone more comfortable with fast-hitting attacks, I wouldn't be surprised if I'd function better as an Archer than a Mage. At the same time, the Archer's support properties may mean I have more flexibility. Beyond basic Vocations, I'm looking at Mystic Spearhand and Warfarer. Depending on the learning curve, Warfarer may be beyond my ken.

As for Mystic Spearhand, I have a soft spot for spear-wielding classes due to Celtic mythology involving the likes of Cú Chulainn and Diarmuid Ua Duibhne (I blame the Fate series for this). This is also the driving factor behind me maining the Dragoon job in FF14. On a lesser-known note, the Mystic Spearhand's weapon is also the same as that of the Eternal Guard of the Warhammer Fantasy fame (i.e. one of my favourite units in the series). As for Sigurd being black instead of white, this has nothing to do with the Maister being a Mace Windu minus the Pulp Fiction. Race is not a factor, although I'm always one for creative diversity (note that I say creative diversity instead of inclusivity because I'm a henjin incapable of understanding the socio-political games being played in today's creative industry).

Some thoughts involving the Vocations trailers

The trailers looked great, that's for sure. If there's anything I could glean from the Fighter's trailer, it'd be the question of whether shield usage is ability-based. I say this because, during my years of playing Neverwinter Online, there was such a thing called class property. Each class has its own unique property set aside from the abilities. We may see something similar if shielding is vital to the Fighter's gameplay. Not just one Vocation but also for the rest. At the same time, it'd be interesting to see whether dodge rolling will be executed in a different manner. Will it retain the button input system from the first Dragon's Dogma game or something simplistic like double-directional input? Something tells me it'd be the former, although only time will tell.

As for the Thief, I see some movement-based attacks together with a few moments of wait-and-strike. This is possibly how a Thief is going to be played. You don't rush in like a berserker. Rather, you process the fight and react accordingly. If it means standing there for a few seconds, it means standing there for a few seconds.

Regarding abilities and attacks, I suspect we will have a four-button input approach just like the previous Dragon's Dogma game. This would allow better concentration in terms of mastering your playing style. However, this also creates a question from the perspective of PC usage. Namely, how is the mouse clicking going to function? A possible answer is that instead of four hotkeys for the abilities and attacks, two of them will be assigned to left-click and right-click, while the remaining two will be done via the keyboard. This would create a streamlined approach while maximising mouse usage.

Final thoughts

I may or may not do another post of DD2 depending on what I process and how much fuel I have in my wordsmith's tank. After all, the Vocation trailers for Archer and Mage have yet to come out. Will I be preordering the game? I'm still deciding on this. Given that this is only the second DD game and the first one to come out for Windows (I suspect Mac users are going to hate Itsuno for this unless they have an Xbox or PS5), it's likely that certain ease would be made for new players. And yes, the music is clearly great. Taylor "no Gone in 60 Seconds jokes, please" Swift is a global class act, but I don't have to be a Swifty to appreciate great music.

How Do We Live? My thoughts on The Boy and the Heron

WARNING!

This post involves heavy spoilers for Miyazaki's latest work. Proceed at your own risk if you haven't watched it.

I've finally watched it. My very own movie of 2023: The Boy and the Heron (君たちはどう生きるか). In the recent weeks defined by Disney's failures in the form of The Marvels and Wish, Miyazaki "not from Miyazaki" Hayao's latest work was a refreshing distraction from accusations of political messaging and counter-accusations of intolerance. Interestingly, the cinema hall was nearly empty when I was watching it. Do I mind? On one hand, it gives off a serene feel, and I like it. On the other hand, I've learnt that quality and popularity don't always go hand in hand. This is why I don't mind being a henjin in a society full of normal people.

Suffice it to say, it was a great watch. While I didn't go all weepy from the beginning till the end, there was a specific scene towards the end which tugged at my heartstrings. As an emotionally dysfunctional person, it felt weird watching it without a shred of emotion. However, it was a thought-provoking watch. If you list gratification as a factor in your choice of movie, this is not the movie for you. But if making you think is your thing, then go watch it. One of the very few movies I watched was Crazy Rich Asians, and it never made me use my brain. I watched Deadpool 1 and 2. I didn't have to use my brain as well. Comparing them with The Boy and the Heron made me appreciate the maestro that is Miyazaki-san.

So, where do I start?

Loss is a reality we all have to deal with. Either you've already dealt with it or will deal with it. Miyazaki-san was no exception, as he lost his beloved mother to a fire when he was a child. The same is true for our hero, Maki Mahito (I'll elaborate on why this kid is the show's hero). The chaotic scenes involving Mahito running through the crowd because his mother was in danger were impactful. In fact, I don't know how to describe it beyond calling it a visible blur of moving images. In this case, the magic of animation came to life. There is no way a live movie can pull this off. I'm convinced of that. More often than not, people disregard animation as something for kids. As a result, the real magic is something that constantly eludes them.

Coping with grief is never easy. Some can move on, but others remain in its shadow. Mahito belonged to the latter. After all, how much should we expect from a child? Right from the beginning, Mahito was a dysfunctional child in a functional family ever since that fateful day. He had a stepmother who happened to be his mother's twin sister. It'd be easier for him to return to normalcy, right? Nope. He had a father who truly loved him. Surely, he couldn't be a dysfunctional kid. Wrong. In a real sense, I saw myself in him.

Seeing him being ostracised in school merely amplified my empathy for him since I was subjected to emotional abuse, the occasional physical violence, and apathy even from my teachers. Yet, being a victim wasn't the end of the story. This despondent child felt he didn't belong to his surroundings. Right from the beginning, a distant feeling was palpable. In a shocking display of malicious manipulation, Mahito purposely injured himself so that his father could get revenge on his behalf while acting innocent about it. No child should be capable of something like that, but this is the dark truth of human nature. I've seen this in my classmates as early as the age of twelve, and I've seen this in myself. I cursed the bully I hated most in ITE as a little dog. During secondary two, I developed a grim joy of witnessing another bully in emotional distress. I expressed myself differently, but the darkness was nevertheless the same. I was the Iorweth to their Dh'oine.

From one world to another

Mahito's entrance into an alternate world was inspired by Lewis Carroll's Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. It's the same case of the protagonist entering another world, albeit through different means. An essential aspect of this was that certain things were left unexplained. Like what was the relevance between the wooden dolls of the maids and their actual selves in Mahito's world? What was the relevance between one version of Kiriko and the other? But therein lies the beauty of Miyazaki-san's world-building. We don't have to know everything. You see, the beauty of fantasy isn't necessarily how much we know. Instead, lingering mysteries can create a beauty no one can comprehend. In reality, it's a fact that humanity can never know everything under the sun. An example of this is the logic of the first cause. You and I know this to be true. But do we know how it works? No. Not even science can explain it, yet science cannot deny it.

Another example is whether we can imagine what absolute chaos looks like. Again, the answer is no because the nature of human imagination is dictated by an actual semblance of order. Chaos, as we know it, is nothing more than a faded version of the real thing. So before you bust your head trying to understand as much as possible, my advice is to give up the ghost. The world in this work wasn't meant to be understood but appreciated.

Yet, the world woven was a dangerous one. In fact, Studio Ghibli was no stranger to adding dark elements to world-building. A prominent example is Princess Mononoke, where the conflict between civilisation and nature is concerned. This is not some kind of socio-political commentary on environmentalism. It is a tale of how cruel the world can be. On the one hand, the expansion of civilisations has been known to cause conflicts.

On the other hand, nature is a cruel master who doesn't care whether one respects it. In The Boy and the Heron, birds eat things. It sounds perfectly normal until you know what they eat: human flesh and baby souls. At the same time, there was a scene depicting a badly burnt pelican talking to Mahito before it died.

This scene is interesting as we're given a glimpse of the emptiness faced by the pelicans. What they desired wasn't eating the baby souls. It's to be freed from a hellish world where Kiriko was literally the only person considered alive. There's a contrast to be seen here: The beauty of scenery against the grim reality of death. This was further confirmed when Mahito pointed out to his great-granduncle that the building blocks used to maintain the world were made of the same material seen in tombstones.

In a genuine sense, the world in The Boy and the Heron is just like the real world. It's full of danger. There's always the danger of bullying, ostracisation, and apathy in school. You have the risk of wrong values dehumanising others and the deception called self-righteousness. The list goes on. If there's one thing parents can learn from this movie, it'd be preparing their children for a dangerous world so that they can protect themselves and become individuals of integrity. Insulating them from harm would only risk destroying them. The solution is to equip them with wisdom and integrity so that they can have the strength to be a blessing to others.

Himi

At first glance, rooting for Himi is easy because she's a strong female character. However, strong characters are nothing if they're not great characters. This is something many people on the internet don't understand. Take, for example, Ryougi Shiki of Kara no Kyoukai. Was she a strong character? She could destroy everything under the sun, for crying out loud. Was she a fragile character, nevertheless? That made her a great character instead of just a strong one.

The best way to appreciate Himi is to base it on something other than the merit of strength. There's a need to see her for who she was: Mahito's mother. Her display of destructive conflagration was intended to protect Mahito from harm, storytelling-wise. Throughout the plot, her role as Mahito's protector was none other than her role as Mahito's (future) mother. In fact, I suspect Miyazaki-san deliberately used fire as an identity symbol for Himi instead of just being the cause of her death. In a certain sense, one could see the symbolism of a phoenix in her. In fact, the movie ended not with her returning to Mahito's current timeline, but rather the past where she would eventually grow up, get married, and have Mahito. The fortitude displayed wasn't something to take lightly. She could have lived a happy life if she had agreed to enter Mahito's timeline. After all, she wouldn't have to experience the same manner of death all over again. But because she's Mahito's mother first and foremost, she made a choice very few women would have made.

Natsuko

Otherwise known as Himi's twin sister, her role as Mahito's stepmother was expanded to Mahito's questing objective. Not only that, it was through her that Mahito developed as a character. Without Himi, Mahito wouldn't have been born. Without Natsuko, however, Mahito wouldn't have grown up. When Mahito decided to enter the forest to bring back Natsuko, we saw a child with a maturity many real-life adults would never have. Instead of wallowing in despair, Mahito decided to do something about the situation (note that I didn't say Mahito chose to do something about his mental state). In an era of "Okay, boomer", where youths believe they're entitled to the right to disrespect others while demanding respect for themselves, it's unthinkable for them to make sacrifices for a family member to whom they're not emotionally attached. Not Mahito. He's made of much better stuff than that. In this manner, Miyazaki-san gave us a glimpse of what kind of person Mahito was despite his scheme to manipulate his father through self-injury.

If there's still any question about Mahito's character, none of it remained when Natsuko lashed out at him in anger despite his efforts to save her. The impact of the reminder shouldn't be underestimated, as Mahito had endured a lot at the hands of a cruel world. This was the world that took his beloved mother away. This was the world to which he felt no sense of belonging. Yet, Mahito kept pursuing what he intended to do in the first place.

Torihito-kun

The titular heron clearly didn't have a name. But for convenience, let's call him Torihito-kun (just don't tell Miyazaki-san that). The seiyuu for Torihito-kun was an interesting pick. Suda "the General" Masaki was also known for his role as Minamoto no Yoshitsune in The Thirteen Lord of the Shogun drama. Unlike the popular versions of Yoshitsune typified by Gikeiki, this version was the anti-heroic Yoshitsune synonymous with the historical records of Azuma Kagami. Like an anti-heroic Yoshitsune, Torihito-kun was also the undisputable anti-hero of the show. Right from the beginning, he was Mahito's tormentor-in-chief. Without the great-granduncle's orders, there's no knowing what he'd have done to Mahito. Yet, something changed. The English title The Boy and the Heron explains Mahito's journey in a self-explanatory way. Like how Mahito didn't get to choose who walked the journey with him, we don't get to choose many things in life. We don't get to choose which country we're born in. We don't get to choose which parents gave birth to us, let alone whether we're adopted. In fact, we don't even get to choose our sufferings. In a symbolic sense, Torihito-kun represented this fact.

What's most touching about this unlikely alliance wasn't how Torihito-kun changed his heart. It's how Mahito's innocence made it possible. Remember, Mahito was no stranger to human darkness and Torihito-kun's antics. In short, there should be no reason for Mahito to treat Torihito-kun kindly. But he did. In the real world of self-righteousness and identity conflict, it's easy to prioritise might over right and still call it right. Yet, Mahito chose not to follow the world. He did what was right instead of just following his heart or head. This goes back to the cruelty of the alternate world populated by death and carnivorous birds. You may not be able to dictate what the world should be like, but at least you can choose what kind of person to be. Either you can follow the world, or you can go against it. Either you can worship the merit of might or embrace the importance of right.

Was it supposed to be WW2?

One interesting assumption concerning this movie is that the backdrop was World War 2. While this was right, perhaps it's not how we expected. In the beginning, I was led to believe the hospital fire was a result of the bombing of Tokyo. But when the scene later shifted to Mahito's father in charge of building boats for the Japanese soldiers occupying Southeast Asia (i.e. Saipan was clearly mentioned), I realised it might not be the case. At the same time, if the hospital fire was a result of Tokyo getting bombed, the damage would have been far more extensive, with the residents forced to evacuate. This led to the question of whether civil defence sirens were also used as fire sirens during those days. So was it really Tokyo being bombed like Iran by America or an unfortunate accident in which America had no part? I leave this question to you all to answer.

How Do We Live: Lessons we adults can learn from a child.

The world can be depressing at times. Recently, I came across news in my backyard that further verified this fact. Don't get me wrong. Objectifying women and sexual harassment are two of the many evils in this world. But to justify one wrong through another wrong is like saying Eren wasn't wrong in destroying 80% of the human population just to save the Eldians. In fact, there's something scarily truthful about Isayama "Hametsu no Hajime" Hajime's signature work regarding human nature (a YouTuber called Soul did an excellent analysis video on this). With that said, I don't use dating apps. Call me a Japanese fossil (because I look more like a Japanese and nothing like a Chinese), but dating apps like Tinder are way too superficial for my liking.

Back to the topic at hand. So why am I talking about human nature? There's a reason why I called Mahito the hero of the story. The reason was his reply to his great-granduncle's request to take over from him to ensure the building blocks assembled wouldn't collapse. The rationale behind this was that the stability of the building blocks stacked precariously represented the stability of every world. Hence, only a person without malice can maintain the benign impartiality needed to perform the task. Mahito, however, stated that he wasn't that kind of person. The proof of his malice? His self-inflicted scar as a result of being bullied. We can go on and on about whether the malice was directed at his bullies or the world, but we cannot deny this was what Mahito said. At the same time, there is something symbolic about the building blocks made from the same materials seen in tombstones. And that is no world is ever a stranger to conflict. The irony of peace is that we wouldn't know what it looks like without conflict. It's just like the matter of evil. Without evil, can we know what is good?

Fast forward to the end, where Mahito, Natsuko, and Torihito-kun managed to escape back to their rightful world (but not before the poignant farewell scene involving Himi's decision to embrace her fate as Mahito's future mother and eventual death), and we see Mahito still holding onto some of the stones used to make the building blocks. Torihito-kun, in his usual self, stated that Mahito would forget about his journey sooner or later. Interestingly, Mahito didn't deny or acknowledge Torihito-kun's words. But was that the critical part?

Throughout his journey, Mahito had to deal with how he should live. It all started with a decision to save Natsuko from an unknown fact and culminated in him confronting himself. In a world full of death, surely he would have remembered the fiery scene. Before the cynicism of realism, he chose to help Torihito-kun despite his actions. Before his great-granduncle, he had to look inside himself instead of saying yes or no. In life, we're bound to deal with decisions. And decisions have consequences (many thanks to the FF14: Endwalker storyline for showing me that). Like what Geralt said in the second Witcher game, decisions should be evaluated before and not after. Ultimately, the decisions we make would decide how we live. Decisions are not just about dealing with circumstances. It's also about living in an imperfect world of conflict, tragedy, evil, and grief. More often than not, we fail to ask ourselves, "君たちはどう生きるか" because we think we're alive. But because we're alive, we have to look at ourselves in the mirror and ask this question: How do we live? Many people wasted years without realising it because they never asked themselves this question. But what about us? It's never too late so long we're still alive.

The Last Wish: My thoughts on Chapter 1 (Part 1)

It's official. Instead of watching TikTok videos for free, I spent 10+ bucks (I wonder if it's SGD or USD) on the first Witcher book. Entitled The Last Wish by Andrzej "Książę Andrzej" Sapkowski, I just cleared Chapter 1 yesterday. In this post, I'd be commenting on my feelings/reactions/analysis/whatever on it. Before I begin, here's a Witcher theme music I'd associate with Chapter 1.

Quality, writing style, and translation

I did a word count check on Google for The First Wish. It's actually a relatively short read at 90K+ words. To put it in perspective, Crazy Rich Asians by Kevin "unrelated to Guan Yu unless proven by science" Kwan had a word count of 100K+. On average, a novel's word count would range from 70K to 120K for adult fiction (i.e. the genre both Crazy Rich Asians and The Last Wish would qualify under). As a writer, I struggle with pushing the word count as much as possible. While my fellow Singaporeans may agree with it, the likes of Prince Andy (sorry, my Polish vocabulary is non-existent beyond the word kurwa) clearly had something to say about it. More specifically, it is the national word of Poland.

Jokes at the expense of Poland aside, it's heartening to see writers prioritising quality over quantity. The best-case scenario is both. Yet, I suspect a common danger many aspiring writers may face is a lack of self-understanding in terms of personal limitations. Life isn't dictated by internet memes of cats being whatever they want to be, but we humans have the funny tendency to live life as if it's one of wondrous internet memes.

I can never be a tank. That'd screw my party up in any MMO.

Recently, I came across news of Bob "I suspect Deadpool is gonna call him Bob" Iger claimed the reason behind The Marvels' abysmal box office showing was "insufficient executives". This is not some kind of Deadpool 4 joke. It's real. In other words, quantity is a must for quality to shine (not my logic, but Bob's). When it comes to writing, however, I'm glad that Prince Andy proved once and for all that quality can offset quantity as long as a specific word count is there. Again, we're talking about the 70K to 120K range.

Reading The Last Wish was an eye-opener for me. Firstly, let me get the not-so-good out of the way. It's been said that the English translation was horrible. While I was comfortable with it more often than not, there were moments when the word usage felt weird to me. It's not about Prince Andy's capability as a writer. Instead, it's due to human limitations when it comes to translation. Those familiar with Fate/stay night memes would know some funny moments resulted from this. In fact, playing FF14 actually revealed such moments of flawed translation.

An example of this is the pre-fight cutscene for P11 where Elidibus says, "my truth," where in fact, the actual wording was, "私の天心" (i.e. my divine will). Another example was Emet-Selch's reaction to seeing Azem in the Warrior of Light in Shadowbringers, where the actual Japanese words were concerned. Overall, though, I can live with it.

Apart from that, I enjoyed reading Chapter 1. In the process of reading, I was forced to challenge my elf. What are the things I need to improve as a writer? What are the things which I can attribute to my personal style? What are the things which I know for sure are beyond my grasp? This requires a combination of humility and confidence. In a genuine sense, being a writer means you can't behave like the typical human being, where it's a zero-sum choice between humility and confidence. It's a paradox. But then again, which human being isn't one?

Writing style-wise, I find it surreal to see similarities between Sapkowski and me. If someone were to tell me my writing style mirrored that of Kevin Kwan, my response would be indifference, But Sapkowski? That's clearly going to be a great compliment unless it's sarcasm. To be fair, we're not identical twins of different nationalities and ethnicities. We both use short sentences instead of the typical longer sentencing style. However, in terms of how the words flow, that's where the difference comes. Sapkowski's usage tends to have that terse feel due to literal short sentences being used with the occasional case of two to three comma breaks. I use commas more frequently to create a two-break sentencing style with the rare case of three breaks in a sentence instead of two. With that said, I'm now using short single sentences to balance things out, as my previous approach was too robotic. It's 100% art and 0% science since I had to go with the feel instead of technical understanding.

Description-wise, it's something I see myself needing more effort. At the same time, a great job of describing scenes is about more than just showing versus telling. It's about knowing when to go all out instead of doing it as often as possible. The logic behind impact is that it works so long you don't numb the audience. Doing it often tends to have that happening. It's not a question of how much but where.

(Note: I believe in telling instead of showing if I want to shock the reader. You may not need to do so if you're not writing dark fiction. But A Requiem From Winter Past is dark, albeit not on the scale of Berserk. That one would be as dark (?) as the Lego Batman song.)

The battle scene between Geralt and Adda's striga was breathtaking. My only complaint was overusing the portrayal of pirouetting as if the Witcher in question wasn't Geralt but Zinedine "Le Professeur X" Zidane. The description of movement, be it the combatants or the silver chain being used, was succinct but nonetheless left nothing to the imagination. I remember reading the Dark Elf series novels by R.A. "not rated R" Salvatore. The fighting scenes were as detailed, but one approach was more technical, while Sapkowski's was less. As a result, Salvatore's fight scenes were criticised as too descriptive-centric. Do I have an issue with that? The answer is no. In fact, Salvatore was the reason behind the way I do my fighting scenes. Yet, Sapkowski exposed the weakness of my style. I was too much into the technical side of things, but I needed more in the description of movement. The fighting scene was a mixture of elegance and brutality. That's what impressed me, among other things.

Made in Japan instead of America: Total Recall (?)

It's belated, but I wish worthy men a happy International Men's Day. Not those who beat their wives, force their girlfriends to get abortions, and break the law even if they're university students, mind you. Instead, it's to the men of responsibility and integrity. Those who slog to bring food to the table, ensure they're responsible for their children, and refuse to break the law even if they're failures in the education system. To such worthy men, I wish you all a happy International Men's Day. Before I continue, I will up a few songs from some series where the protagonists are clearly men worthy of International Men's Day.

Why Total Recall?

The reason behind this post title is simple: Arnold "not Weissenegger" Schwarzenegger and Gray "still a blue" Davis. Like how the state of California decided to do a Total Recall on Davis back then, I decided to do the same on specific rotations in FF14. The reason behind this was the Balance guide website for FF14 gamers. I went through the standard opener diagram for Dragoon. I told myself, "That's インポシブル". The reason is that trying to do that is like alternating between braking and accelerating. Already, I'm struggling with using the Dragon Sight-Battle Litany rotation. However, seeing how Dragon Sight and Lance Charge were utilised in a 120-second-60-second rotation gave me something to think about. At the same time, going through the guide for Machinist also told me I was doing certain things wrong.

Total Recall: Dragoon

In terms of the GCD rotation, there's no change. The same goes for the Geirskogul-Nastrond-Stardiver and High Jump-Mirage Dive rotations. Only two changes were made. Instead of continuing with Dragon Sight-Battle Litany and Lance Charge-Life Surge rotations (the former for the Chaos Spring GCD rotation and the latter for the Heavens' Thrust GCD rotation), I decided to go for Dragon Sight-Lance Charge for my Chaos Spring rotation and Battle Litany-Life Surge for my Heavens' Thrust rotation. In boss fights, the DPS clearly went better. In fact, the time taken to conclude a boss fight was considerably shortened. However, there's a catch: For this to be done, I chose to burn the 5% bonus from buffing a party member for Dragon Sight. It definitely works, though. It's like Oda Nobunaga leading a squad of 2500-3000 dudes instead of 5000 against Imagawa Yoshimoto's army of 25K men.

Maximising Dragon Sight in the middle of a fight was a nightmare when I looked back at it. It hampered my DPS momentum and disrupted my focus. In short, I wasn't using it frequently enough. I can't say I'm autistic, but I do have tunnel vision. This is why I dare not run as a tank or healer in any group content beyond MSQ roulette. Playing FF14 on a Japanese server has its challenges, the language barrier being the most significant one. While Japanese players are really good at doing group content (apparently, they're going to be very happy to see Dawntrail coming), the fact is that I can't communicate with them. 

Interestingly, as a DPS player, I already obtained 350+ player commendations. It doesn't seem like much. In fact, it's probably not much. But as a casual player who can only play well as DPS, I find it surprising. I actually expected less than that.

Back to the Dragon Sight dilemma. The only way for me to maximise Dragon Sight is as a preparation buff before entering combat. Against bosses, this is detrimental as the damage will not come out fast and furious enough. Against mobs, however, that's a different story since they last shorter than bosses in any fight. At the same time, being a melee DPS means the likelihood of the Dragoon being the last to enter the fray.

The Battle Litany-Life Surge rotation is effectively a 120-second-40-second buff rotation. At the same time, this buff rotation would have come out in the middle of the combat instead of at the beginning. By then, my party's DPS momentum would have stabilised. In short, the party benefit of Battle Litany is made better. In my last Fell Court of Troia run via level 90 dungeons roulette, the final boss fight was over surprisingly fast despite struggling with the mechanics. The tricky part is whether I should use Battle Litany before or after Vorpal Thrust. The good thing about running a 2.5-second GCD build is that you can calculate when the Battle Litany buff will expire. 15 seconds would mean 6 GCDs. It should end at Raiden Thrust if I use it before Vorpal Thrust. If it's after Vorpal Thrust, the duration should end at Disembowel. If the math looks weird, it's because your eyes aren't playing trick attacks on you since I have to consider around 0.1-0.3 second's worth of difference. When I activate Battle Litany, the GCD would have already hit zero.

Note 1: Using Dragon Sight with Lance Charge can also result in effective True North management due to Dragon Sight ignoring positional restrictions. It's either Dragon Sight-Lance Charge or Lance Charge-True North. The worst-case scenario is wasting one charge of True North due to occasional panic. That's all.

Note 2: Right now, I have to decide between using the second charge of Life Surge on Wheeling Thrust while Battle Litany is active or saving it for the next Heavens' Thrust after the duration expires.

Total Recall: Machinist

The only change made is lining up Wildfire with Barrel Stabiliser, as it would ensure more consistent usage. My main issue was that I needed to use both more often. Right now, Wildfire is executed first before Barrel Stabiliser. But it will probably change because I suspect my brain would trigger faster if it is to process Barrel Stabiliser before Wildfire instead of vice versa. As for Chainsaw, lining it up with Reassemble is possibly a better bet than doing so with Drill. The reason is that doing otherwise may mess up my Hypercharge rotation. At the same time, I use Reassemble sparingly. So, there's a theoretical chance of pulling off a Reassemble-Chainsaw-Air Anchor rotation more often.

Note: My Machinist has yet to hit level 90. So the Chainsaw part does have a chance of changing.

Total Recall: Black Mage

There are a few changes I need to think about. Namely, forcing myself to use Aetherial Manipulation more often and lining up Ley Lines (no pun intended) with Amplifier. In certain fights, there's a need to close the distance ASAP. Playing Samurai and the resultant ease in using Hissatsu: Gyoten taught me that. At the same time, mistakes were made before where I should have used Spineshatter Dive instead of moving forward while sprinting was on cooldown.

As for Ley Lines with Amplifier, that can be very useful in any fight, be it mob or boss. If I can make Dragon Sight-Lance Charge rotation work in both scenarios, I wouldn't be surprised if I can pull this off as well.

Made in Japan instead of America: I got a Xbox (controller)

It's been confirmed. Playing FF14 on a PC with a keyboard and mouse will result in a far lower camera zoom height. How did I know? Well, it started from the recent fanfest involving Sakaguchi "the Original Guchi" Hironobu trolling Yoshi-P. From the footage, the game was played on gaming monitors. At the same time, I read somewhere that the オリジナルぐち was using a combination of an Xbox controller and keyboard. Emboldened by this, I decided to purchase an older model of the Xbox controller (i.e. it was a 2020 model) since it should be good enough for the PC version. That was during Halloween although I don't celebrate it. Since I ordered it from the Singaporean Xbox online store, I got it on 2nd November.

As it turned out, my 80+SGD gamble paid off. After wiring the device and updating the controller software, I started the game. The increased camera zoom was only slightly higher in the major city zones (I tested it in the Empyreum, where my private housing is and my home destination of Gridania). However, the difference was clearly seen once I ran Thaleia and P12N. In fact, having a much larger visual field greatly helped my rotation efficiency as the stress on my focus was significantly eased. At the end of the day, FF14, unlike other games I've played, involves plenty of stuff happening at the far end of the arena.

That's a Viper, not a snake

It's official. Dawntrail will NOT feature its second 2nd Amendment job. Before the big reveal, many of us believed the new melee DPS job would be Corsair. After all, the original trailer did exude an explorer's vibe. While the extended version retained the same old feel, what we saw belted at the waist wasn't a gun but a sword.

Interestingly, despite the view that it's an original job, connections were made to Zidane.

Wait, that's the wrong Zidane.

Yep, that's the correct Zidane.

With that said, the Viper job actually reminds me of R.A. "not rated R" Salvatore and Drizzt Do'Urden. The former is a writer while the latter happens to be a POC protagonist (technically speaking) in high fantasy created by... well, the former. The reason is that like the Viper, Drizzt is a wielder of two long blades. In fact, fans of Dungeons And Dragons would know one of the ways to play a Ranger is dual-wielding. Aesthetics-wise, the hood gave off an Assassin's Creed feel. As for when the weapons were sheathed, that reminded me of the Witcher series where Geralt of Rivia also has two swords strapped on his back albeit in a different manner.

If you think the above music sounds as Iberian as Princess Leanor, you're not alone. Of course, there's no way anyone would play this during her oath-swearing ceremony. But still, it sounds as Iberian as the Spanish royalty, Portuguese armada, and the stereotypical Catalan genius.

For the rest of this post, I will speculate on how the Viper gameplay may turn out.

DISCLAIMER!

Whatever is stated here is purely the product of speculation based on the teaser trailer. I do not claim to be a genius, let alone the stereotypical Catalan type.

In the introduction, the Viper was said to be a job focusing on alternating rotations. Apparently, attacks are stance-based. What this possibly means is that we may end up seeing a stance switch ability similar to the Black Mage's Transpose. At the same time, how technically complex would the job rotation be?

First off, let's count roughly how many GCD abilities were on display in the teaser. By my guess, it'd be 4 where the dual-wielding aspect is involved. At the same time, stance-switching seemed to include an attack as well. Assuming the joint-swords rotation would also involve 4 GCDs, that'd be 5 abilities in a single rotation for either stance since the stance-switch would give an extra attack. Of course, is it a given that the joint-swords rotation will consist of 4 GCDs? It depends on whether each GCD ability has two versions. If the answer is yes, then the number of dual-wielding GCDs will mirror that of the joint-swords version. FF14 is no stranger to this due to examples like Dragoon's Nastrond and Samurai's Kaeshi abilities. At the same time, the rotation would involve numerous OGCDs as well. As a Dragoon main, this reminds me of the OGCD rotation involving Nastrond, Stardiver, and Wyrmwind Thrust where I can either use it after the first rotation or in the middle of it. In fact, a tactic I tend to use whenever possible is using the OGCD rotation after executing Disembowel as I can benefit from the Power Surge buff without breaking the GCD rotation. If you're using a controller, I can only say good luck. But if it's keyboard and mouse, I'd say it's 100% doable so long as you adopt a linear clicking approach.

Of course, this comes to the question of what the OGCD abilities would look like. This is impossible to predict although I doubt the developers would want to create a Dragoon 2.0. When it comes to the definition of numerous, however, my own guess is possibly 3-4 OGCDs.

For the GCD rotation(s), a vital question waiting to be answered is whether we will deal with DoT damage. In FF14, we have jobs that give DoT damage by the end of a GCD rotation. But we also have jobs which don't have that. At the same time, it's possible for the developers to utilise any DoT damage ability for the Viper in the same way they did for the Machinist and Dark Knight (i.e. Wildfire and Salted Earth). My greater concern is whether each GCD rotation would end with a specific buff similar to the Samurai's Shifu and Jinpu buffs.

On how rotation alternating may work, there are two possibilities: Linear and fluid. Linear would mean dual-wield rotation>joint-swords rotation>rinse and repeat. As for the fluid approach, it could involve a main stance rotation and a support stance rotation. Either the dual-wield rotation is supported by the joint-swords rotation or vice versa. One possible outcome is that joint-swords attacks may have a longer cooldown or an execution delay of 0.5 seconds when Dawntrail comes out. In short, it's not easy hitting the ground running when it comes to DPS momentum. You probably have to find a way to create a pace you're comfortable with before stepping on the proverbial accelerator. It's not like some other DPS jobs where you can fly off the traps (e.g. Dragoon and Machinist because I main one and alt the other). Try to think of it as going along with the flow before going fast.

Lastly, we come to the buffing. Or the blue aura, if you will. One question I have is whether this is related to the Viper's job gauge. Interestingly, the blue aura buff actually resulted in two changes:

1. The attacking speed was greatly increased.

2. The attack animations were changed (assuming we're dealing with GCD rotation).

If the blue aura is the result of the job gauge, the question would be what else is part of it. There are job gauges in FF14 that don't function singularly. An example of this would be the Dragoon where you have Life of the Dragon and Firstminds' Focus. Another example would be the Black Mage where the job gauge consists of multiple aspects. Then you have jobs with two separate gauges like Dark Knight and Samurai. At this point, anything goes.

The Wolf, The Lion, And The Maiden Fair-Chapter 2

AGE WARNING:

This work is one of dark nature. If you're below the age of 16, then you're better off reading something else. I don't profess to follow my country's rules where only foreigners like G.R.R Martin and Miura Kentaro can write dark fiction. At the same time, my responsibility to restrain myself doesn't mean sensitive people won't be offended. I'm a storyteller, but I'm not an activist. For every Meghan Markle, there is a Dazai Osamu.

Chapter 1

A Requiem From Winter Past

The Wolf, Lion, And Maiden Fair

(Written by Cocteau L'Enfant Naturel)

Chapter 2-The Lion And His Dream

"A dream is made of two things: The sweetest nectar and the most bitter truth."

~Araea eos Clochneid

)0(

Rias Morris is annoyed, a shout as loud as a lion's roar sending a jolt through his heart and into the head. While everybody was sound asleep, the most incredible idiot alive shattered their peace. A forceful grip pulls the dreamer off his bed, his object of wrath sprawled face-first on the wooden floor. Greeted by sapphire eyes wide open, every recruit sends his glowering regard to a sandy blond of average looks.

"Erm... it's a dream, no?"

Cairos Ryvers gives a sheepish grin, his brown shorts and a white collarless shirt mirroring what the rest are wearing.

"You're having a nightmare," snaps his closest friend with a growl and grimace, his fiery hair mirroring anger. "To be straight, I don't give a flying shit on why you're screaming like someone shafted by a ten-foot pole. But don't wake us up for the love of the Holy Quintet!"

"Did I scream that loud, Marv?"

Cairos's question becomes the fuel feeding a simmering fire of annoyance, his hand running through his cropped sandy blonde hair.

"If a mutt can't bark, it ain't one." snarls Marvus Creek, his hands seizing Cairos by the front of his shirt, "You better pray our bunk officers won't end up hearing a stuck pig screaming. Ever wondered how the gods judge an annoying moron?"

Cairos feels like a swine ready for slaughter for the first time since he accidentally punched a parishioner years ago. An image conjured itself into his mind. A morbid picture looms, a macabre portrait of countless knives stuck in his body playing games with him. For some reason, castration feels like a better option.

"I get the picture."

"The picture of a stuck pig."

With a retort, the redhead cursed with a history of being an accomplice in every misdemeanour mouths a silent prayer for a miracle. Despite being one to scoff at the idea of divine intervention, Marvus already accepted this as the only solution to Cairos's buffoonery.

"Why are all of you standing here?"

A question hollered cuts swiftly into every listener's ears, its impact a beacon of warning. Fifteen lads hastily stand in ranks of three before their bunk officer, his sturdy frame decked in padded armour.

“Marvus Creek and Cairos Ryvers! Why are you not standing at attention?"

"Sorry, Sir! We're way too engrossed in teaching our friend how civilisation works."

Grett Mains shakes his head in amusement, for taking charge of the infamous Fifth Unit is either the greatest joke or the cruellest jest. While troublemakers belong to the minority in any army, seasons in the military taught the brunette fighter how to be a pragmatist. A few rotten apples are enough to spoil a crateful, let alone a unit of living absurdities among an army.

"You're crazy beyond cure, Marv! Why mention civi..."

A slap across the head cuts off Cairos's response as Marvus is in no mood for mercy.

"Shut up! You'll get us all shafted."

Delivering a wry smile conceived by well-humoured nature, Grett Mains doesn't have to be a genius to know the answer. Cairos Ryvers has developed a notorious reputation ever since he assaulted a judge and an acquitted rapist on the same day, his weapon of choice an iron stick grabbed from gods-know-where.

"It's only natural for people to have nightmares."

Exaggeratedly clearing his throat, Grett continues his speech.

"But no more heroics! The Fifth Unit's reputation isn't everybody's fault. Still, I also know beating up rapists and authority figures is a matter of choice. Understand me, lads?"

The youths under his charge sing a song of relief inside, the jaws of Seven Infernos finally giving up the chase. One dumb moment could have shafted them ten times over, each individual making a mental note to buy himself a carving knife lest an idiot decides to do something shocking again.

"Listen up! With all things said, prepare yourselves for the roll call. Dawn is nearing. May the roar be with us! Understand?"

With his proclamation done, a grinning Grett Mains sweeps a right hand dramatically across.

"Yes, Sir!"

Grett leaves the bunk as vigour makes its premature entrance, every resident's need for slumber gone. Random chatter soon supplants every pair of tired eyes without exception.

"It's good to have nice bloke Grett as our bunk chief. Luckier than me playing buff poker with those idiots from Welos."

"You hypocrite. When was the last time a cretin beat up an intelligent person from Welos or Thebis?"

"Last week? Or was that last month? You need to tell me, Marv."

"Cairos Ryvers, I swear you're asking for…"

Before Marvus can finish voicing his thoughts, the morning bell tolls. Anticipation washes over Cairos, his passionate grin worn like a badge of pride. The sandy blond cracks his knuckles, inner fire coursing inside. He spent four rigorous seasons at the Mesatos Academy. The life he badly wants begins its path. This is the prologue to a hero's tale, the beginning of a story. The bathhouse is to be his next destination, the banner of Lionian Brethren emblazoned inside his mind and heart.

)0(

Breakfast is a fare of bread and cheese. Officers and recruits dine alike, their seats placed side by side. Regulars steer clear from such practice, for this is an act earning scorn. They call it a rarity, an insult to the military. The Lionian Brethren would have none of it, their penchant for causing the occasional trouble always appreciated by the smallborn. Arrests begetting only confinement worth a week or two, the situation used to be worse until the Senate approved new laws prohibiting vigilantism. Peddlers of rumours whisper the Emperor is unwilling to rein them in, a laughable tale since Antios III is known as the Iron Yew for his impartiality. No matter what, they belong to the smallborn more than any other Hallenian. Status and rank can burn in the Seven Infernos for all they care. Their motto would always stay unchanged, an obnoxious insult to the rich and elite: Shaft the status. Shaft the money. Shaft the kings.

"Not bad at all. Given I've tasted shit before."

With a quip and an off-tune whistle, Cairos's plate is cleared and returned.

"This isn't Thebis, where not even the Holy Quintet know what their cooks are smoking before lighting the stove," chuckles Marvus, his foul mood dissipated. "There's a bit of time before we gear up, so why not a little bant?"

"I agree. Beater and..."

Cairos Ryvers promptly receives his due for outspoken enthusiasm, a punch across the back of the skull his reward.

)0(

"Are you thinking with your arse?" snaps a wrathful Marvus, his red hair ruffled in frustration. "Who told you to out ourselves? Do you even know what that nickname means?"

"Calm down, Marv!"

"I suspect the only way for me to do that is to roast you alive. I know Cairos Ryvers is Beater, but are you so obsessed with letting the entire Teslon know my nickname?"

"Erm… yes? You're good at pleasing girls. And Elys is one."

"You should've accepted Adarl's request for marriage when you got the chance. Shaft her, and at least you won't leave this world pathetically. A right shame she made that offer when we're too young to beat people up since she went missing after you probably said something dumb."

"Adarl?"

"Yes, Adarl. Anything wrong with my cold-hard truth?"

With eyebrows raised and a question asked, Marvus' annoyance increases an irritated tone.

"That pretty serving girl at Uncle Chard's inn?"

"Not just an ordinary idiot, huh?" sighs the redhead, exasperation wearing him down like an insatiable lover. "You blind arsehole, which Adarl are we talking about? Yes, I did see that beautiful girl. Slim, but pity she got a small stack."

"Well, that's Adarl."

"Are we talking about the same person, you retarded bastard? You better don't tell me a different Adarl took your virginity."

No sooner a sardonic barb left his lips, shock dawns upon Marvus Creek. Realisation seizes him, a gaping look revealing something he'd rather die than admit to. If there's a unique trait in Adarl everyone knows, it'd be a mole below her eye as if it's more of a teardrop than a birthmark.

"Wait a holy moment. Please don't tell me…"

"I was about to tell you I saw her last month during our final trench leave!" grins Cairos with a victor's look, his mischievous smile feeding the redhead a massive slice of humiliation. "Can you believe she recognised me first?"

I must be hearing things. I must be hearing things. Seriously, that stick-thin ugly duckling Adarl?

"Oh, and one more thing, Marv. I didn't shaft her. Not in the past and not recently. Her father would have hanged me for that."

)0(

The Empire's underbelly is never for the weak and ignorant. There are always more than a few dark corners and alleys as ominousness casts itself over every lane. Many robbers lie in wait while smugglers haggle brazenly with buyers. No tavern is a stranger to the darkest sins. Fittingly so for a place known as a nether district where money, power, and the ruthless speak the loudest.

"So, how's the business?"

No woman should ever be comfortable before lecherous leers, yet not a finger is laid on Adarl Tayne. Unlike its counterparts, the Coral Sea would not hesitate to throw out patrons guilty of starting fights or deeds ten times worse. Tales of barmaids raped are commonplace, its keeper uninterested in trouble.

"Closing by autumn. It's a good thing I was informed before you decided to risk your body."

Why Lukas Broun would ever wind down a successful business is anyone's guess, for the Coral Sea's intolerance towards lawlessness is always the most attractive draw. Not every patron has the hobby of strangling his neighbour, for violence is only enjoyable to those not at the receiving end.

"Tell me what you know about Cairos," says Adarl as she sips her drink, an offer of hospitality on the house. The brandy served is no ordinary grade, for her discerning taste recognises it as a Histalonian craft. Assuming Lukas was truthful in claiming legality, only the gods knew how he managed to secure his stock constantly. Not all things expensive are good, but at least a good drink is bound to cost significantly more.

"Me? Why always me? You should be asking those more righteous than a knave."

"I just need to know what happened between you four seasons ago."

"Let me assure you Cairos is my friend," answers Lukas, a smirk and wagging finger taunting Adarl. "Unless he desires it, I won't get him into trouble. Let alone myself."

"I heard that place was where the village of Redcart used to be. He could have asked Marv along, but he didn't."

Adarl's reply and expression tell the same tale. There are things the willowy brunette has to know. She witnessed before another Cairos Ryvers: Someone resembling an animal of justice instead of that clueless boy holding her heart captive long ago.

Lukas starts laughing aloud, the attractive lad courting more frustration from an equally beautiful lass.

"Which means he trusts me more than his best friend? It's good that Marvus Creek isn't around to hear you say that. He'd pick a fight with me. That one may be a decent brawler, but he's too honourable to understand you win fights through a knife in the gut."

"Marv injured himself."

Her composure fraying faster than an arrow loosed, Adarl is in no mood for pointless talk.

"An amusing accident involving a tree. Marv shouldn't have done something stupid to impress Elys," replies Lukas, his mirth the answer to Adarl's retort. "She'd still warm his bed willingly for the night, idiocy or no idiocy."

For the Holy Quintet's sake, tell me what's going on back then!

"Cairos wanted to confront his past. A past which he has no idea about."

Visage turning sombre with a sigh, Lukas leans against a shelf of liquor bottles.

"But if he can't..."

Dismissive wave cutting off words of concern, Lukas caresses Adarl's chin to her disgust. She has never taken a liking to Lukas Broun, her disdain having nothing to do with his preference towards men. He is always one step ahead of the rest, his hand never revealed until the time comes. The owner of Coral Sea is a master plotter. And Adarl holds no love for tricksters and swindlers after the manner of her cousin's suicide.

"Everyone has a past. You too, Adarl Tayne. Remember random boys taunting how stick-thin and ugly you are? You have truly blossomed. Apart from your breasts, of course. That's a compliment, not an insult. There's no such thing as perfect beauty."

"I don't see the relevance," says Adarl, her frustration snapping at its target.

"Yes, there is. Some choose to forget. Others choose not to let go. We're all like that. Such is why you choose to love a man regardless of whether he loves you back."

Chagrin consumes Adarl, her palm ready to strike. However, Lukas grips her wrist before the slap begins its descent, his deceptive strength forcing her to give up.

"Then there's our common friend forced to forget and cursed with the urge not to let go."

Lukas releases Adarl's hand as he finishes his statement, his confidence in her not retaliating justified.

"Did you two discover anything?"

With a curt reply, Adarl concedes defeat. Then her eyes stray towards a male patron, a grinning sober man attempting to force himself on one of the serving girls.

"Nothing."

Without warning, Lukas strides towards the offender with a dagger drawn. A left-handed grip grabs the fool by his face, a knife swiftly buried into the neck.

"My work is never done. Can someone please take out the rubbish?"

Returning to Adarl's view, Lukas tosses another knife upwards and catches it by the tip.

"I have nothing against excited men, but not in my backyard. So where did we stop?"

With those words, he plunges the blade against the counter table.

"You didn't ask why I'm interested in Cairos's past."

A question posed masking the intent to test, Lukas nevertheless detects Adarl's move.

"That's because I don't care who he marries so long she can keep an eye on him. I owe him a debt, but I don't expect myself to be worthy of repaying that lion of a man."

"What debt?"

"Does it matter? We don't share the same bed, but I know the two of you will. Mind you, my informants are everywhere."

)0(

"You can't touch me! I am under protection!"

 Cairos didn't blink in front of someone clearly in hysteria. Whether an acquitted rapist should be protected wasn't his business. The sandy blond went to the Imperial Zoo once, the thought of someone feeding this dastardly dog to a hungry beast an entertaining notion.

"Stop it, Cairos. Bastard's not worth your time."

"Well, he's not worth yours as well, Brouno."

If there's anything he understood, it would be those self-murmured words. If he wanted something done, he'd get it done. If someone could get away with rape and branding a witness a lying whoreson, this witness could also get away with what he's about to do.

"Cairos, you hear me? Do it and the law will go after you!"

Getting sick and tired of people telling him about the law, the being of wrath wondered what the good old days were like before he was born. The fact of changes was undeniable, but it didn't mean people shouldn't be tossed into the River Tes so long no one stepped forward. Marvus was yelling for nothing. Lukas' advice wouldn't work a shit. Cairos took down a self-righteous judge less than a day ago, for the worth of integrity was never something to the arrogant.

"The law protects me!"

Those words were undoubtedly the most laughable jest Cairos had heard. Was it the law of the gods or the law of men? Cairos Ryvers was not religious, maybe even someone who never believed in higher powers in the first place. Questioning the existence of deities was always a pain in the arse, the sandy blond concluding time wasted on something without an answer is time better spent elsewhere.

"Tell me... tell me how many girls you have shafted."

The scoundrel's face froze on the spot, a sight worth more than a sea of precious gems.

"How many?"

Anger boiled inside Cairos as he interrogated a criminal, for the enforcer understood only the rights and wrongs in their purest forms. If that fellow believed what he did was funny, it meant a real comedy was about to be shown. The falling iron rod clanging on the ground, Cairos's gesture was not of mercy. Given a choice, he'd prefer murder. But there's a promise he must fulfil with Irlia. Hence, he couldn't risk it all just because of an injustice served.

"Well, you know what people say about retribution?"

If Cairos must recall any lesson learnt from his uncle, it'd be that righteousness is a god who always wins. He rued not making a wager with Marvus Creek and Lukas Broun, for he was sure this person would be rendered impotent by the end of everything. Forcing the legs open, Cairos was more than prepared to stamp a foot down to the crotch.

"No!"

Seeing an arsehole scream was one thing, but watching him black out was priceless. The best part of his life was this. Given a choice, Cairos Ryvers wouldn't trade this moment for anything else apart from Irlia's hand in marriage.

"Oh my gods! Parkyns' lad killed him!"

"Pah, that son of a hundred-year bitch! Who cares?"

Even though there was no way to prove it, maybe the gods were real. Cairos did not know the two old men, but the meaning behind an approving grin said it all. A strong hand gripped his shoulder, relief overtaking Cairos upon knowing who.

"Moron! What if you killed him? Trading a scum for jail? Who's your classroom teacher?"

"It's not as if he's dead. So keep calm, Marv. It's the end."

Cairos lied, for it's not the end. He would throw that lawbreaker down a dried well. Either that or permanent impotence would be the verdict. Then there's still the iron stick pilfered from his uncle's forge.

"No, Cairos. That's enough! More of it, and he will die."

Lukas' rebuke held Cairos in his place. It was the ability to reason and win that made it possible. Marvus was far less an idiot than Cairos, a fact all acknowledged. But if someone could convince another that what's dead was alive and what's alive was a goner, no one could do so like Lukas Broun. The brunette then smiled as if something good was happening or already happened.

"Guess he lost control of his bladder."

"So how are you going to clear up our retarded friend's mess, Luk?" queried Marvus, his question marked by a shrug. "First the judge, now him. I don't mean the pissing part, by the way."

"I'll make sure he lives. And while I'm at it, staying noiseless as well."

)0(

"So how fared your source of information?"

There is no difference between days ago and now. The attractive elf's silvery blond hair remains slicked back and tied. Elongated ears flippantly caressed, this is a figure of unflappable confidence and eerie calm. A maroon doublet is worn over a white shirt and secured by a silken sash. Trousers of linen and leather shoes complete the look.

If there is anyone Adarl detests most in dealing with, it's never Lukas Broun. At least he has a predictability, namely his friendship with Cairos. This other individual is a different kind of monster altogether, for his emerald eyes never betray a trace of emotions while smiling like a cunning rogue. Before their first meeting, Adarl already knew how elves looked. Hauntingly fair and aloof, each always places a hand on the handle of a weapon as a show of force. No one tried asking them the manner of their business. Such has been the fear they commanded. More often than not, a passing banter involving elven women would result in a life mysteriously gone. The speaker's tongue would go missing again, a dagger wedged between the victim's shoulder blades.

"I have a request for you, my fair lady. In return, I will tell you something you want."

Edeaux eos Nimhein seized the initiative, his negotiation style unbecoming of the Homm'Nua. They prefer the direct approach, their pride a stumbling block. He introduced himself as a seafaring merchant from Histalonia, his words not entirely false. His past was in Croiduns, home to his people. But his present is now in a land of money, status, and power. A place of skulduggery with no reprieve for the weak and tardy is where he belongs.

"I know you desire a certain man. I also feel the same for another. My informant told me both parties know each other as friends. Please check on him. Ask away any questions in your mind before him, and I shall see that a fitting reward for your efforts."

"He's fine," says Adarl, her wary brown eyes focusing on the surroundings. Knowing anyone capable of preventing deplorable men from doing their worst can easily be the same kind of brute, any assumption of a Histalonian keeping his end of the bargain holds no meaning. After all, she knows what kind of nightmare the Island of Dreams is. No one laid a hand on her back then as Lukas was sighted waiting for her. Something wasn't right with the situation, for Lukas warned her not to trust a snake while escorting her through the nether region. When questioned, he murmured about choosing between an adder's venom and a viper's poison.

"Why should I give you a new home in one of my many bordellos? You are a fine maiden, but I have a better one in mind. Here in Teslon, no less. No offence intended towards your bosom."

Edeaux's smirk never loses its curve, his relaxed posture one of a feline waiting to pounce.

"Fine then. As promised…"

Laughter from the elf interrupts Adarl's words, his reply cutting short her statement.

"There is a hidden orphanage in the ruins of Redcart. Hidden because a forest now stands where a boy's lost childhood used to live. A small patch of land from my best of knowledge, no more than a few acres by my estimation."

"They say it's haunted."

The speaker is not Adarl, the voice all too familiar to both listeners. A slim figure dressed in bartender's garb greets them both, his androgynous features bringing slow applause from Edeaux.

"Ah, all hail the one whom I brought up."

"Spare me your greeting, Serpent. Adarl, please leave here at once."

Lukas' blue eyes of anger catch Adarl off guard. The daughter of Chard Tayne knows trouble is nearing. As she turns her back on the two, Edeaux's message manages to reach her ears, the clarity akin to a king's herald announcing his liege's coming.

"Seeing a red-haired maiden or her dark brooding knight means you are on the right path. Make sure the damsel is Ciras and her guardian Kain."

)0(

What in the Seven Infernos?

This dream again?

How many times I've been through this?

I'm standing in the middle of this blizzard again. Everyone is dead. Some look familiar, but I don't know who. The rest are just strangers. There's this girl with her head cut off. The colour of her hair is like the reddish snow.

Do I know her?

"Can you keep up with me?"

I hate that voice without knowing why. His emotionless tone makes me feel like punching him.

Part of myself says this fellow is responsible, but the greater half of me denies it. Like always, he's dressed in dark green and a brown leather vest. Grey gloves reach below his elbows, and his boots are knee-high. Then there's this bloodstained sword in his hand and a grey cloak flapping wildly towards one side.

My legs feel numb even though I don't feel the cold. My vision is blurring without the pain. My joints are already stiff, but my fists remain clenched.

"Can you keep up with me?"

Yet the same old question from the same old arsehole. A fire flares up inside. Its warmth rouses me. Its presence reminds me of something which I can't remember. Bloody Seven Infernos, returning to Redcart really made me and Brouno look like a pair of running idiots going after a prize that wasn't there.

Sky blue eyes, long ears, and brown skin is a look I'll never forget. His hair is short and parted to the side, but the rest of his face remains hazy. You better try keeping up with me instead, bastard!

I start running after him. There's no way I will lose. There's no way I can lose to him! I can surely keep up with him. I will do so!

)0(

Glossary

Holy Quintet: The collective name of the gods of the Causaceans' official religion. There are five of them: the Father, the Planter, the Warrior, the Learner, and the Juror.

Welos, Thebis, Mesatos, Teslon: Four of the ten northern regions of the Hallenian Empire.

Lionian Brethren: The only militia officially recognised by the Empire's central government based in the northern regions and restricted within the boundaries.

Bant: An informal word for banter.

Shaft: An informal term for having sex.

Trench leave: Any period of rest given to members of the military.

Imperial Zoo: One of the numerous parks in the Hallenian Empire where animals and birds are held in captivity for people's viewing purposes.

River Tes: A major river in the northern regions irrigating the lands of Teslon, Thebis, and Welos.