Romance of Three Kingdoms was meant to be #fakenews
When I say the man himself, I'm referring to Chen Shou instead of Luo Guanzhong. To understand the difference between the two, let me show you all this chart below.
I'll be brutally honest here. Comparing Chen Shou's Record of Three Kingdoms with Luo Guanzhong's Romance of Three Kingdoms is like comparing any of the names in the green box with those in the orange box, if not the red one. It doesn't matter whether it's InfoWars or Occupy Democrats in the crate of apples, neither does it matter whether it's Daily Kos or Drudge Report in the box of oranges. Just go for the likes of BBC, The Christian Science Monitor, Bloomberg, and Wall Street Journal.
Why I say this is very simple: The difference between one RoTK and the other lies in how much being written was real. This is the reason why people are still stupid enough to call Liu Bei the good guy while at the same time too dumb to understand Cao Cao's contributions to his era.
Oh, and speaking of BBC, someone forgot to disable auto-resolve.
Kuok Kah's Top Stable Genius Moments 1: How to defeat terrorists
Like how the number one target for this year's Nov 6th is the Senate, Cao Cao's number one target was to be Lu Bu. At that time, Gongsun Zan was already annihilated by Yuan Shao. Therefore, the intuitive view should be "Lu Bu, you're next and I'm gonna take your Diao Chan!" It's like assuming Al-Qaeda would come and save ISIS when the Shia brigade attacked Mosul. But so did Hamza send aid? Apparently, nothing came out from Hamza bin Laden's mouth. ISIS (most likely) left hanging dry could be seen as a moment of counter-intuitive truth, but so was the possibility of Lu Bu allying himself with Yuan Shao instead of Yuan Shao attacking the baddest turncoat of his time. To elaborate on this statement, let's take a look at the people whom he turned against.
1. Ding Yuan. This guy was his foster father. Didn't prevent Lu Bu from accepting Dong Zhuo's bribes.
Outcome: Dong Zhuo bribed Lu Bu, Ding Yuan died.
2. Dong Zhuo. This guy became his second foster father. Or something like that. The fact that he's cruel, perverted, and a rapist didn't repulse Lu Bu.
Outcome: Wang Yun manipulated the situation because the two never trusted each other. At least not fully. Dong Zhuo died.
3. Liu Bei. This guy didn't die. In fact, he's way smarter than the two Ds if you're to ask me. This was also why Cao Cao stated that Liu Bei and himself were the two greatest heroes alive. ["天下英雄，唯使君与操耳。"]
Outcome: Liu Bei didn't die.
Special mention: Wang Yun was the only person whom Lu Bu didn't betray. It didn't prevent him from dying, though.
Now it must be stated that Lu Bu not only had a flip-flop reputation (arguably) worse than Donald Trump, he was also a real badass fighter. Two most notable sayings are as below.
1. Like Lu Bu amongst men and the Red Hare amongst horses [人中吕布，马中赤兔]
2. Lu the First, Zhao (Yun) the Second, and Dian Wei the Third [一吕，二赵，三典韦]
The former was definitely historically accurate, but the latter was #fakenews invented by people from Occupy Democrats and InfoWars.
Due to his fearsome repute as a military man (contrary to what you see in Hollywood, an exceptional military man is more of a fighter and tactician rather than a dumb soldier high on bravado), Yuan Shao couldn't afford to attack him first. Yes, Lu Bu was definitely Greedo, but it didn't mean anyone could be Han Solo. In other words, Yuan Shao could only accept Lu Bu's offer of aid while maintaining his guard. Of course, the likes of Ju Shou and Tian Feng would advise against this move. But we all should know Yuan Shao's character by now.
Lu Bu couldn't be trusted, but he could be a valuable asset. That's why and how he could get away with his acts of betrayal (apparently, he's so depraved that he actually abandoned his own wife in order to womanise with his men's wives and girlfriends). Kuok Kah's proposed strategy of attacking Lu Bu first had four important points:
1. If Cao Cao was to attack Yuan Shao first, Lu Bu would pledge his aid to Yuan Shao instead of Cao Cao. That's how much reputation and being a high SES could give Yuan Shao. Note that the Yuan clan was known to produce members assuming the positions of Three Dukes for four generations. [四世三公]
2. While Yuan Shao wouldn't want to anger Lu Bu, attacking Lu Bu first would ensure Yuan Shao staying his hand unless the former decided to plead the latter for help. But even then, Yuan Shao wouldn't want to entertain the idea of wasting too much of his resources due to the threat posed by Cao Cao and Lu Bu.
3. The battle must be swiftly conducted and swiftly ended. Prolonged attrition would weaken Cao Cao, hence encouraging Yuan Shao to pull off his own moves.
4. Staying put without doing anything would just result in Lu Bu offering his aid to Yuan Shao nevertheless. Like how there's no point in controlling the Reps without bossing the Senate, there's no point fighting Yuan Shao if Lu Bu wasn't bumped off first.
Did the battle commence smoothly? Hollywood movies enjoy extolling the virtues of the white dude. Namely, brawns before brains. If you got brains, you must have the appropriate brawn to back it up. Lu Bu would have been that white dude poster boy. However, real life is never Hollywood's BFF (hence, the infamous R-rated scene in Tropic Thunder). Cao Cao was no match for Lu Bu in terms of the Hollywood factor, but the fact that he's a military genius (seriously, this is 100% #realnews) means Lu Bu was doomed. The battle went very well for Cao Cao. That was until the battle arrived at the gates of Xiapi where the troops entered fatigue mode. Cao Cao was sorely tempted to sing Beat It and really say "beat it". Kuok Kah advised against it.
Translate:
"Xiang Ji was undefeated for more than seventy battles, yet he lost the momentum, thereby resulting in his death and the demise of his country. All this was because of overconfidence in his bravery while lacking foreplanning. Now that Lu Bu is being defeated at every battle, his strength is now sapped with the defence lacking in both outside and within. Lu Bu's ability is never on the par with Xiang Ji and he is now overwhelmed by defeat and fatigue. If we continue to press forth, he will be captured."
At the same time, another adviser Xun You said the same thing. In fact, the historical text seemed to indicate the two pointing out the same logic at the same time.
[攸与郭嘉说曰：“吕布勇而无谋，今三战皆北，其锐气衰矣。三军以将为主，主衰则军无奋意。夫陈宫有智而迟，今及布气之未复，宫谋之未定，进急攻之，布可拔也。”]
Translate:
Xun You and Guo Jia advised: "Lu Bu is one with bravery, yet without foresight. Now that he's being defeated repeatedly, the enemy's morale is at its lowest. An army is always dependent on the general leading them. If the leader is weakened, the men below him would experience a severe lack of morale. His adviser Chen Gong is wise but hesitant. We should attack Lu Bu while he has yet to recover and before Chen Gong was able to decide on a plan. If we do that, Lu Bu can be defeated."
(From Xun You's account)
It's very likely that while Kuok Kah and Xun You said the same thing, what was recorded in his own account concerning Xiang Ji was bonus content. It doesn't make his advice any less real, but rather it's what we call a supporting statement. In fact, it's very likely that Kuok Kah spoke first before Xun You voiced his support. Hence, Fuzi's account of Kuok Kah's Xiang Ji logic.
So who was Xiang Ji? Xiang Ji refers to Xiang Yu, the guy who seemingly won it, only to lose it totally. The battle of Xiapi actually reflected the war against ISIS, believe it or not. When Anbar was finally liberated, it's only natural that Mosul would be next. I've read an article (can't exactly remember where I've read it) and it stated that there were those fleeing after defeat. Guess what happened next? No words of affirmation or encouragement, only death by torture. Now if this was really true, then it's pointing to the inevitable. Namely, the fall of Mosul and the downfall of Raqqa.
Fear without motivation can be fatal. There's clearly something unnatural about these armed (and dangerous) zealots tasting fear. Note that they didn't surrender. They just ran back! At that time, ISIS needed every man available due to a massive haemorrhage in manpower somewhere in 2015. That's like one year after they reached the peak of power. By killing those who were willing to die for their Islamic State if future chances were given, own goals aplenty were scored. This wasn't about sending forth the right message. It's called sending the wrong message. So what made ISIS believe that Mosul would remain under control? The writing was already on the wall, it's as clear as what Belshazzar saw before the Persians and Medes pulled this off.
All your base are belong to us, we don't care if you're worse than a muppet.
Of course, no one said fighting a war is easy. If someone can block you on Facebook, it means Lu Bu could block Cao Cao at the gates of Xiapi. If Cao Cao ordered a retreat, that'd be like allowing ISIS to keep Mosul without a fight. If ISIS shouldn't be keeping Mosul, then quite obviously Lu Bu shouldn't be keeping Xiapi.
Like ISIS losing momentum after losing Anbar, Lu Bu was already out of steam. Totally. Lu Bu's contempt shown to his men was like ISIS executing the wrong people in plain sight after losing Ramadi, Fallujah, and pretty much the whole of Anbar. Xiapi was besieged at every corner, all Cao Cao needed was a breakthrough. Like Isco doing a risk pass resulting in a goal scored by Rodrigol, Cao Cao created a literal Lake Life. Not Lake Life@Taman Jurong, but Lake Life@Xiapi.
Kuok Kah's Top Stable Genius Moments 2: It's not coming to our home.
There were two moments where Cao Cao was left sweating for the Emperor. Remember, His Majesty was to be more powerful than the nukes. Not as a person of authority, but rather the one pawn justifying Cao Cao's political authority. Everyone wants to rule the world and every party wants to boss the Senate. So what makes us think Cao Cao wanted to lose His Majesty?
Two moments of would-be crisis came to minds: Sun Ce out to seize His Majesty and Liu Bei persuading Liu Biao to do the same. Not at the same time, but at different intervals. For Sun Ce, that was during the Battle of Guandu where Cao Cao and Yuan Shao finally had a go at each other. Three Kingdoms fans should know how badass this Sun Ce was. Cao Cao once called him a young lion while someone named Xu Gong likened him to Xiang Yu. In fact, that's what got Xu Gong killed because the circumstances surrounding this moment of comparison was pointing to Sun Ce being identified as some enemy of the state (i.e. Xiang Yu was an ambitious warlord after all).
That's where Kuok Kah pointed out that Sun Ce wouldn't arrive at Xuchang (note that this was where His Majesty was kept). The reason why being that Sun Ce had killed many of those who offended him. Yes, there were many who became his vassals. Capable men of valour and wisdom, no doubt. But all of such people? Kuok Kah doubted so. At the same time, he concluded that...
1. Sun Ce was one who didn't understand the virtue of being wary of his surroundings. [然策轻而无备，虽有百万之众，无异于独行中原也。]
2. Sun Ce would be assassinated in the situation where it's one man versus ten. Ip Man is fictional, forget about taking on ten men all by yourself. [若刺客伏起，一人之敌耳。以吾观之，必死于匹夫之手。]
As for Liu Bei, it'd be when Cao Cao was busy dealing with the remnants of Yuan Shao's faction (note that Yuan Shao had died by then). I'll come to that in the next post. Long story short, Liu Bei attempted to convince Liu Biao to give him some men and horses. All in the name of saving His Majesty (which was pure political BS anyway). Again, everyone was worried whether this would happen. At that time, Liu Bei had yet to arrive. However, such fear was already buzzing around like a swarm of gnats. The midges were out in full force, but Kuok Kah called for calm. The reason why was due to three factors:
1. Liu Bei was a man of capability and ambition. Hence, Liu Biao had never trusted him in the first place. Remember, this was an era where East Asians were indulging in their favourite historical pastime of each man fighting against his neighbour.
2. Liu Biao only knew how to talk a good talk. When it came to doing things, he's like a muppet. Which means he's truly a muppet regardless of talking or doing.
3. Liu Biao was stuck in a damned-either-way scenario. If he agreed to Liu Bei's request, he'd risk losing it. After all, Liu Bei could command more than just a Jing Province once he got the Emperor. If he decided not to trust Liu Bei, quite obviously Liu Bei wouldn't want to serve him.
Note: I know point 3 sounds like the relationship between Donald Trump and Ben Sasse. I know it does.
Again, this comes back to the war against ISIS (again?!?!). Imagine the Iraqi forces stuck at Mosul fighting the terrorists. Imagine worries of reinforcement coming. After all, that's what one should expect in any battle of attrition, no?
Kuok Kah's analysis was down to how he saw the big picture. Sun Ce and Liu Bei merely belonged to part of the picture. Analysing a situation is like piecing together a picture. It's like doing a jigsaw puzzle. You have the pieces, now put them together. You have the dots, now connect them. It's like why any worry of reinforcements coming was to be no worry at all for the Iraqi forces. You have Mosul, but you have Aleppo as well. Aleppo was definitely Syria's Mosul. In fact, Aleppo is geographically closer to Raqqa. Much closer. Expecting ISIS to ditch Aleppo to defend Mosul was the dumbest decision possible and the powers-that-be weren't prepared to be that stupid. The terrorists defending Mosul got their hands tied. They had no choice but to fight a battle with limited resources. And I really mean limited resources.
ISIS was in a damned either way situation. Just like Liu Biao. As for Sun Ce, I agree with Pei Songzhi for a reason. In the past, I disagreed with him despite an infinite gap in personal status. Allow me to explain below.
To arrive at Xuchang, Sun Ce must enter the Jing Province first. In fact, the Jing Province was the bridge between Jiangdong and the rest of China, something which I pointed out in an attempt to explain why Zhuge Liang's Longzhong Strategy was actually doable. It's like saying ISIS had to seize control of Aleppo first before bringing relief to their besieged brethren in Mosul (and this was not to mention Aleppo is situated at one end with Mosul at the other). So now we got a question: What was Liu Biao's relationship status with Sun Ce? We all know the bad blood between the two. It's not your daily Taylor Swift drama. Liu Biao killed Sun Jian, who was Sun Ce's father. The Sun family never forgave Liu Biao since after. So do you think Liu Biao would allow Sun Ce to cross over to Xuchang by using his own territory as the bridge?
While it's possible for Liu Biao to have a hand in the assassination process, I erred in the sense that I assumed Sun Ce's death took place in the Jing Province. A closer look at the historical text, however, actually implied that the Mossad brigade did their job before Sun Ce set off since the attack took place during a hunting trip. Let's be real, you don't expect Donald Trump to go on a hunting trip while in China even though the Chinese enjoy eating anything with four legs that move about.
To be cont'd...
My focus isn't in a good state. Thankfully, I got this song to keep me going.
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